Slow Down, Be Kind, and Fall in Love: A Spiritual Practice

As some of you might know, I spent about five and a half years studying at Naropa University in Boulder, Colorado. I spent two and a half years as an undergraduate student and three years as a graduate student pursuing a Master's degree in Contemplative Religion with Sanskrit language.

Naropa was founded in 1974 by the Tibetan Buddhist teacher Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche. Trungpa Rinpoche was a Tulku, a title in Tibetan Buddhism given to someone recognized as the reincarnation of an enlightened master, in his case, the previous Trungpa Tulku. This is the same tradition that recognizes the Dalai Lama as a reincarnated being, who is perhaps the most widely-known Tulku today. Before passing, a Tulku often leaves detailed instructions for their closest disciples on how to find their next incarnation. This is a fascinating process unique to the Tibetan Buddhist tradition.

Trungpa Rinpoche’s Influence

Trungpa Rinpoche has had a profound influence on my life.

His teachings, through books like The Myth of Freedom and Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism and through studying with his prominent students Dr. Reggie Ray and Dr. Judith Simmer-Brown, who were my teachers at Naropa, have shaped me deeply.

Recently, Dr. Judith Simmer-Brown shared a touching video of Trungpa Rinpoche speaking to an audience. That video inspired this post, and I dedicate it to him.

In the video, Trungpa Rinpoche says to the audience, “I would like you all to help this world.” He then offers three simple yet profound ways to do so:

Reduce speed

Reduce aggression

Fall in love with something or other

1. Reduce Speed

When I heard Trungpa Rinpoche say "reduce speed", it immediately made me think of the old Simon & Garfunkel song, The 59th Street Bridge Song (Feelin’ Groovy), which opens with the line, “Slow down, you move too fast.” That song was released in 1966, and Trungpa Rinpoche gave his talk in 1982. If people were moving too fast then, imagine the pace of life and the speed of our minds in 2025!

I’ve definitely felt it myself, that rush to keep up, to stay busy, to fill every moment with doing, so Trungpa’s reminder to “slow down” really hits home. Slow down means to stop and smell the roses. We don’t always have to fill all of our time and mental space with activity. We can slow down and work on being rather than doing. Slowing down and devoting some daily time to being rather than doing can help to discover the peace and stillness within. This can be a quiet walk, or doing a spiritual practice like meditation or tai chi.

Moving too fast can also mean we’re being impatient. When we’re patient, we can be present and enjoy the moment. But when we’re impatient, we’re always thinking about what’s next. When we slow down, we can enjoy life more and feel more peaceful. When we slow down, we can be present with other people and really listen to them and connect. In slowing down, we come back to life as it is, and life as it is is spacious, workable, and full of connection and wonder.

2. Reduce Aggression

Where there is speed, aggression is usually close behind. Aggression often arises when we try to impose our will on others or even on ourselves.

You might wonder, "How can I impose my will on myself?" Let’s say you want to learn piano. You’re motivated, but after a few weeks, you feel frustrated by your lack of progress. You begin berating yourself: “I’m terrible at this. I’ll never be good.” Here, your desire (to play beautifully) clashes with your current ability, and that frustration turns inward. Aggression is often born from the gap between expectation and reality.

This happens with any goal, whether it’s losing weight, starting a new project, or forming healthier habits. When things don’t progress fast enough, we turn against ourselves.

The antidote? Patience, steadiness, and love. These are all qualities emphasized in spiritual traditions across cultures.

In our relationships with others, aggression often stems from misunderstanding and poor communication. These, in turn, often stem from a lack of patience and a refusal to really listen. Whether we’re dealing with individuals or groups, it’s easy to fall into the trap of domination, asserting our will to get what we want. But if we recognize that everyone shares a common desire to experience happiness and avoid suffering, we can begin to cultivate empathy and connection instead of control.

3. Fall in Love

Trungpa Rinpoche said that love is greatly needed in this world. While we might fall in love with one or two people, he encouraged us to fall in love with the world, because that is what truly matters.

Most of us love a few things, our children, our families, our pets, but that love often stops short of extending to our neighbors, let alone the broader world. Trungpa was inviting us to expand the circle of our love to include not just people, but also animals, plants, oceans, rivers, the sky, the sun, and this entire universe.

It's also helpful to find things you love to to do that inspire and rejuvenate you. I love to meditate, I love to sing, and I love to take walks in nature, so I try to do at least two of the three every day. This helps me stay balanced and energized through the ups and downs of life.

A Loving Practice

Imagine if we each committed to just these three practices: slowing down, softening our aggression, and falling in love with life. What kind of world might we create?

I invite you to join me in practicing these three things. We don’t have to be perfect, just sincere. Let’s try our best, and I believe we’ll see positive changes not only in ourselves but in how we relate to the world, and how the world relates to us.

With Love,

Paramesh

Link to Chogyam Trungpa's Video: https://fb.watch/zOEPVMS45c/